50th Blog Post

Crap, have you seen the time. I have a blog post due in 2hr45min. Been pounding out Goverment tender quotes all morning and my brain is mush.

Last week I was preparing to tackle Sadie (for legal purposes I mean tackle her in a competitive non violent way) in a run.

Well, we've done one together and a few alone. To report back there was no winner. 

We started the run with a walk to warm up. Sadie got it in her mind she was an olympic power walker and I spent the first 500m trying to swallow my heart. Horrific feeling I tell you. The jog felt good and I got a good rythym. My slightly longer legs make me a little quicker and I had fun running next to her changing speeds just do make her cross. Mission successful. Klap over the head to prove it. Just before half way I decided to tease Sadie a bit, telling her she's slow and poodle could out run her. I didn't stop. Sadie got fed up and said "Catch me if you can" and BOOM, she was gone. Full on canter down Dulwitch road and up the other side. I caught up to what I thought was her because at that stage I could see stuff all. My vision had gone, my heart was in my throat and my lungs where busy collapsing. We ran side by side trying to secretly kill each other. I think our bodies synched because all of a sudden we where both walking. In unison we both glanced sideways at each other and started to Olympic power walk. I don't really know what happened from there. Stuff that was I losing to a chick and by the look on Sadies face she now reads my blog and knows somewhere on the property there are dirty magazines lurking about. Weirdest thing ever happened. We seemed to have worked out all the aggression and ended up encouraging each other. United in one goal. To get fit and funky. Shit, that's soppy!

So it's Sadies birthday tomorrow. I guess I'll buy her a cool book. That way she won't watch T.V and I can jol Xbox while she reads. That's what being a warrior is about. Being Smart.

A tradition is you have a family supper together so now I have to think of a cool meal to cook her. I don't see this as a challenge at all. I love cooking. I actually started a food blog a day before this one. I just enjoyed this one a bit more and haven't had the time to update the food blog.

If you want to send her a Happy Birthday message you can mail me bruce.supertutors@gmail.com (read that as please do so I don't get a klap over the ears) and I'll pass it on.

Something interesting. My dad has started up a blog. Yip, it's a family affair now. Just waiting for mom to start.

Dads blog is www.mikefrostmtb.blogspot.com He is currently in Zimbabwe doing a ride for Wild dog awareness. As important as saving the Rhinos are it has taken the spotlight off a lot of other endangered animals like the Wild dog. This ride isn't a sponsor me so I can go on holiday ride. My folks and the other members are paying their own way and whatever is raised is donated to the Wild dogs.

As he gets wifi he will e-mail or update his blog.

Have a great week friends. Writing this has put me in a good mood and that's why I love blogging.

Made it on time, what a warrior.

Have to Beat Sadie and buying dirty mags

Has anybody seen the date? We halfway through the year already, or somewhere around there.

Sadie and I are going for an afternoon jog this afternoon. I am NOT taking the bladdy pooches. It's too cold to stop every 5m for billy to spray whatever is fixed to the ground. Today especially they are ban. I haven't ran with Sadie in a while and I have a sneaky suspicion she is stronger than me. I think on the sly she has been training. Waiting for the day I ask her to join me on a run. Waiting to show me whose boss again and I can't lose to a chick, especially my chick. It just hammers my confidence. I can just imagine mornings in our house. Sadie: "Babe, please make me some coffee". Me: "Arguah arguah - Sleeping, tis cold". Sadie " Coffee or I'll beat you......... AGAIN". Nought, this is not happening. I will win today even if I die when I finish, I'll die a winner. 

Sport is the only way you can beat your chick.................... Legally (I pray Sadie doesn't read my blog)

Away from shallow victories and onto serious threats. Hunger Games and their timing.

So centuries ago, the Mayans made a plan that December 21 2012 the world will end and the Alpha males will fight it out to see who is superior. This superior being will carry the human race forward. Populating the world with his genetically superior genes. In a nutshell it's like Facebook friend culling, you keep the friends who post pool party pics and delete the ones who are only there to see how cool you pretend your life is on Facebook. 

So those who didn't wish me happy birthday last year, be warned, the Snowbeast is angry ;)

I am worried that the organisers of the Hunger Games can't keep time, we 6 months late. I mean Justin Bieber was 2 hours late for a UK concert and was fined thousands of Pounds and had reports written that he was going off the rails.

Poor guy, When I was thirteen I didn't even own a watch.

My Hunger Games box is growing, it now has the two dirty mags I need to distract bow and arrow chicks stalker. It was awkward  as hell buying them. I went to the mall and decided this will be the last place in hell I will buy these from. You surrounded by decent people doing their own thing and the minute you touch them the mall goes quiet, everything goes in slow motion and everybody stares at you like you walking around with a dead raccoon in your hands. So I went to a place of ill repute. I charged in and placed my cash on the table and blurted out. "Two dirty mags please". The salesman pointed towards racks and racks of these things. The choice was mind blowing. So to skip the details I picked up two with people on the cover who look similar to Bow and Arrow chick. If I'm going to drive a wedge in this mans side I'm going to make sure it hurts...... A LOT.

My mind is now scarred. I have left the mags in their plastic sheets just in case Sadils finds them. I'll have more of a leg to stand on if they sealed - I hope.

Cheers 

Dirty mags and Kids

Right, so exams are over and it's time to start blogging again.

Much better than exams in my humble opinion.

Back to the immanent threat of The Hunger Games. Chatting to a mate I have one problem. What if they throw me into the gauntlet with kids like Rue from the Hunger Games? Yinna, I'm a warrior but not a murderer. Maybe I'll take some chloroform with me. Like the old pick up line, (presenting a hankie from your pocket) "excuse me miss, does this smell like chloroform to you". It's a knock out. 

So the kids will get chloroformed and removed to a safe place. Maybe I'll chain them to the kitchen and when I get back to my cave after a successful day of hunger gaming the little tykes will have a meal prepared form me. Dam straight, that is how a snowbeast rolls. BOOM!!

Wait, what if the little shits conspire to kill me and poison my food. Crap, I didn't think of that. I might have to cut their tongues out and remove any limbs they don't need. 

Whoah, maybe a little excessive considering I am trying not to hurt a little kiddie.

I'll come back to this thought, I hope I have time to sort it out before a face bow and arrow chick and her little side kick.

As for her lover, He seems a little desperate. Chasing her around like a lost puppy. I think what nobody realises is he's secretly trying to see where she's showering. Thinking with the wrong head mate! I'll throw some dirty mags out and bop him on the head as he picks them up. Problem solved. 

Where do i get these mags and how? If Sadils sees my card statement or finds whats really in my Hunger Games stash she might send me to a quack to sort my Alpha male brain out. 

Imagine walking into the garage and finding a back pack with a bushman bow and arrow, two butcher knives her Granddad used to own, matches, a tent and a bunch of dirty mags. Yinna, I'll get the frying pan.......... AGAIN.

The Poodle reckons we mates now. It's partially 'cos Charmaine  gave her a haircut and Sadie is insisting on tying a triangular scarf on her so she looks country and western. Poor thing, comes with it's tail between it's legs and looks at me like I'm the only normal thing in the household. I'll take her on my side, for one reason. Chicks dig Poodles. I'll set her free around bow and arrow chick and when she bends over to pick the bladdy thing up, BAM, she gets it. 

Hope you all have a great day......